The dreaded scales...

Hi SWSYD Crew! It's Marianne, you're Wednesday morning blogger. I'm really excited about our group blog and wanted to say a HUGE thank you to Vikki for setting this up. Here is a quick introduction:

Name: Marianne Grasso

12WBT Forum Name: MarianneG

Age: 30

Completed: Round 2, 2011

Blog: Life is a Journey

Image via HERE.

Today is Wednesday, and to the 12WBTers it means weigh-in day...but what is it about standing on a scale, and staring down at a number that freaks us all out so much?

Put simply, scales are an instrument for weighing...but scales are so much more than that! They assess whether we have stuck to our commitment and achieved our goals. They often rule our lives, and in particular our emotions.  They can either motivate us, or send us on a downward spiral.

I don't have a good relationship with scales...even when I like the number displayed, my scales and I are still not friends. Let me explain...I have struggled with my weight my entire life. I started Weight Watchers at the age of 19, and during my first weigh-in I was mortified. I had to stand on the 'old fashion' scales and watch as the woman measuring moved this little lever further and further to the right.

Image via HERE.

Each week I would weigh in and the little lever would move closer to the left...what a relief! I reached my goal weight of 58kg a few months later...but no one had told me how hard it would be to maintain and I became fearful of the scales...wanting the number to stay the same and not move up!

My weight hovered between 58kg and 64kg for a few years, but when I became pregnant with my first daughter, everything changed. After following the Weight Watchers program for 5 years, I thought all my Christmases had come at once when I heard the words "You're pregnant!" Awesome...I now could eat anything I wanted because I was eating for two! On visiting my obstetrician I was again faced with the 'old fashioned' scales and watched as the little levers moved further and further to the right...every...single...month. By my due date, I had put on 30kg...ahhhhhh. I thought the weight would just disappear after giving birth...how wrong I was! I worked very hard during the first year of my daughter's life and at her 1st birthday I again weighed 58kg.

During the next two years my weight again hovered between 58kg - 65kg...you see, once I reached 'goal weight' and saw that 'magic number' I thought I had reached my destination...and still hadn't comprehended that it was a constant journey that I would travel.

When I fell pregnant with my second daughter, I was determined not to put on 30kg...this time only putting on 15kg...which I was proud of...but guess what? I haven't been able to shed the weight this time and MAINTAIN. I've gotten so close to getting under 70kg (my new 'magic number' and milestone), but whenever I get close...my body...my mind decides that I'm not worthy of achieving my goals...and I binge...and binge....and binge, until I'm back to exactly where I started.

So you see, the scales and I are not good friends. Even when I like the number that I see, the scales turn into my enemy, and the mind games begin.

Image via HERE.

I'm tired of being ruled by the scales...and I'm not going to let the scales beat me this time round...who's with me?!!

We're in charge...and if we all support each other on Weigh-in Wednesdays, than hopefully weighing-in won't be such a daunting task...because we're all in this together...

Remember: Life is a journey, not a destination!

What's your relationship like with your scales?